Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Redo x2 Summary Response Outline Bully
By: Kayla Lampe



  • Topic sentence: title, author, strong verb, main idea
    • The movie Bully, directed by Lee Hirsch, sheds light on how bullying affects one’s life.
  • According to the movie, people commit, or attempt suicide because they felt as though they could no longer live through the relentless physical and emotional bullying. The movie shows how bullying can cause mental problems, such as self doubt.
  • Concluding sentence: restate main idea
    • Lee Hirsch clearly depicts how bullying can influence one’s decisions in life .
  • Only third person
  • Supporting ideas
    • no quotes
  • facts; no opinions
  • Explain ideas
  • Concise
  • Attribute ideas back to author
  • No plot
  • In your own words



Response:
  • Make an argument
  • take a position (correctly or incorrectly portrays)
  • Topic sentence: title, author, strong verb, agree/disagree (correctly portrays/ incorrectly portrays), because ___________ and ______________
    • Bully directed by Lee Hirsch correctly depicts how bullying may hinder one’s life because it can lead to suicide.
  • Claim 1:
    • Set-up
      • As the film proceeds, many different stories are told of how suicide affects someone. One student, Ty, was eleven years old when he was pushed so far he chose to end his own life. Ty was bullied to the point where he felt he did not deserve to live any longer.
    • Evidence: Lead-in  “ quotation” (       )
      • Another boy, Alex, was interviewed in the film and stated, “I’m starting to think that I don’t feel anything anymore,” (Hirsch).
    • Explanation of quotation to prove claim
      • Alex told this to his mom because he had been bullied for so long, he felt immune to the bullying. If this continues he could likely end up committing suicide, too.
  • Counterclaim 1: However, ....
    • Set-up
      • However, not all people that are bullied commit suicide. Parents report bullying to principals, school boards, and teachers in a hope to put an end to it, but they are told that bullying is just another thing that happens and is a part of every child’s life.
    • Evidence: Lead-in  “ quotation” (       )
      • Kelby is a teenager who gets bullied for being gay.When her dad was talking about how the staff at school respond to the bullying, he made the comment, “They all put on that plastic smile and say, ‘I will see what I can do’,” (Hirsch).
    • Explanation of quotation to prove counterclaim
      • Kelby’s parents confronted the school principal and the principal acted like everything was okay and no harm was being done. Many people will say they will take care of it just to get you off their back, but they have no intention of fixing the problem. Instead of Kelby choosing to end her life, she chose to move to a larger city and start going to a new school with hopes of no more bullying in this new city.
  • What are the strengths/ flaws of this argument?(Rebuttal)
    • Some people, such as fearful adults, would claim that bullying is just another thing that happens, and that it doesn’t do major damage. This position seems reasonable because someone might not attempt suicide because of mental and physical damage based on how they handle being bullied, but it’s more complicated than that. Everyone who is a victim of bullying will be damaged in some shape, way, or form. Often, students do not communicate their feelings and express their emotions through self-harm and suicide. Even when a kid does not physically show their pain, they are hurt on the inside. People need love to thrive and when they do not receive love they are bound to be hurt. Alex was a boy who was bullied in the film and he said, “I’m starting to think I don’t feel anything anymore” (Hirsch). His emotions have been toyed with and he would prefer to lose all emotion than to feel the hurt that these kids cause him to have. Tyler’s a clear example that when people are bullied they have higher risk of committing suicide.
  • Concluding sentence: restate main idea
    • Overall, the film Bully showed us that self-harm is a common result to bullying and one’s life is often damaged when bullying takes place.



1 comment:

  1. Add title to concluding sentences. Punctuate title correctly.

    Expand on explanations of quotes; Explanations of quotes need to explain quote and connect to claim/counterclaim point.

    Eliminate personal words

    17/20

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